And the Oscar goes to...

I always kinda wanted to be an actress. I figure I could so rock that job. SO easy. All you have to do is pretend to be something you're not and get fame and fortune for it. I think I'm an actress already. Aren't we all?
I was voted "class Clown" out of 400 people in my senior class in high school. I think my Dad is still a bit disappointed that I was not "most likely to succeed" or even "biggest flirt." I really thought I had to perform to make people love me early in life. I struggled with that even after I became a believer in college. I thought I had gotten over feeling that burning need for attention but I realized today that...my entire job is performing.
See, I'm a corporate trainer for Cingular Wireless, now the new AT&T. I basically spend my days entertaining adults while trying to teach them about our company culture and sales tactics. I thought this was a great job for me, until I took it. In my first class, I was being observed by a superior, and I was told that since I now indirectly worked for Human Resources, I had to watch what I said. She informed me that it was not appropriate to say "flippin" in class. As in, "this flippin projector is not cooperating." She educated me on how flippin and freakin were simply replacements for another f* word. No crap. I thought to myself...she better be glad I didn't say the other f-word. I was also told to avoid referring to an entire group as "guys" and that my sarcastic tone could sometimes be offensive. Well, damn. I actually thought they hired me for my smart-ass humor.
Anyway, sometimes I am so tired of performing. It actually is a great thing I have to do it in my job. Maybe I will do it less in my personal life.